One small dream for a man... one giant dream for mankind?

In my dream I was running around late at night doing errands in my pink Lucy pajamas and I was thinking hmm this probably isn't a good idea, but I wasn't tired so I decided to go to Target and look at the Barbies. Which I do occasionally. So I go in and there aren't any in the first section with the discount toys (this wasn't set up like your normal everyday Target.) so I went to the back, larger section and then suddenly there was an explosion in the front part and dust and smoke was going everywhere. I was kind of stuck back there until it calmed down and I started to come out. The police where investigating and there was a guy sitting down in a chair. He got up and started hitting on me and told me he was an astronaut, which I was inclined to believe at the time because he had a gray polo shirt on with the NASA logo and there was another guy standing off to the side in full astronaut garb (as I explained later in the dream to Steph. Is it weird that I used the word garb in a dream?) so the whole thing didn't seem as out there. The casual dress astronaut sort of looked like this: Note the Bulldog on his shirt, I do actually know this person. Not well enough to dream about but more so than some of the people I dream about. (I'm talking to you John Cusack.)

Anyway, since earlier that day I had had a "I haven't dated anyone in 5 years, I haven't even been asked... what's wrong with me?" crisis so I was slightly more receptive to his come-ons than I would normally be. Plus he was tall and kind of cute. But in order to be safe, I decided Steph had to come with me. So I go to her house to get her and I walk in through the kitchen and her mom is there and she offers me some wine and I'm like no thanks but she is like sobbing and keeps toasting her father, who has just died, and her son, whom she lost. (? Her words, considering as far as I know she's never had a son I'm not sure what that means.) So I just go upstairs and get Steph. The next thing I remember, we are at a stoplight - it is still way late and dark - and Steph and the guy are having some sort of heated discussion and I'm just staying out of it. So we get to a restaurant and they tell us the wait is 3 hours and I'm like that is just too long so we go back to my dorm. There or on the way, I discover he is really some sort of con man or maybe spy and naturally I find this upsetting. I ask him his name (which I apparently never thought to inquire about before) and he gives me something vaguely Arab sounding and I'm like c'mon your real name then he says something enigmatic like "I have many names" or "I am known by many names" and shows me a list of all of his other identities. But I keep insisting what's your real name and finally he tells me Jack Wick and I'm like "well I think if I had known Jack Wick I would be able to fall in love with him" or something equally nauseating. And then he kisses me and it's a nice kiss but then I realize, hey he's a professional liar or whatever he is, I should probably not close my eyes because he might steal something from my room. Then I also realize something else and abruptly stop the kiss and was yell "were you responsible for the explosion?" and he was like, well yeah! As if to imply it was no big deal, just a part of his job. Apparently I feel very strongly about not blowing up Targets so that's when I finally kick him out. Steph (who was not in the room for the kiss and sappy Lifetime moment) gives me grief about falling for him (although I still believe he really liked me and I was not part of some con or heist or whatever) and how stupid could I be thinking he was an astronaut, etc... Also he may have taken something from her house when I was fetching her. Needless to say, this doesn't help the whole "I only attract sociopaths" theory.

Project Dreamgay

I had a dream recently where I arrived at uh somewhere, ha, not really sure. It was either a neighborhood or some sort of studio/work space. I dunno, but I was totally naked. Then my gay designer friend who somehow utilized the space but also had condescending neighbors. He was like a gentler version of Jay from Project Runway. Anyway the other people I came with were like hey, why are you naked? And I was like because will dress me way better than I can. And he did. And then we went somewhere fabulous. Oh how I miss my gays. They are so hard to find in Fresno.

Red-headed Dreams

I've had a lifelong dream (no pun intended) of being a redhead. (I think a Debra Messing red.)

So in the last two nights, I have subconsciously lived out that dream. First, I dyed my hair red with one of those at-home rinses and initially, it seemed successful: good color, even throughout, I don't know what other qualities to look for in dyed hair but I was happy. But last night, I noticed it was splotchy, some parts were darker or even pink and others bleached (not sure how that happened) and some not dyed at all. So then I tried to hide my failed attempt from my Mom and I found that if I side-parted my hair on the left side instead of the right, I could hide most of the worst of it and then, from the front anyway, it just looked like I had one of those ugly but intentional jobs. My mom wasn't fooled however and confronted me and then just laughed because I looked so stupid.

Also I remember I had a dream about Dober, which was weird. Also a dream in which I tried to buy the Lucy doll I've been looking for but the only "Lucy" doll I could find was the remake of the original in the zebra bathing suit and it even had blond hair so I was like "hey, who do you think you are fooling?" and also weird, the inside the box was really plain. Normally they have colors or pictures or something.

Dreams Full of Heart

I dreamt that I met and hung out with Melissa Joan Hart. Which would pretty much be a childhood dream for me.

Won't be haunted by dreams I've deferred

Last night: I dreamt that I was Daniel Radcliffe's girlfriend. And we were nauseatingly affectionate. Then I had another dream that was really cool, except I don't remember very much now. It was sort of an epic magical fantasy and we rode around on horses in vaguely medieval costumes trying to a certain spot in a field where there were these whirling clouds overhead.

Before that: Amy and I went to "the city" but we were supposed to get back in time for Katie's sweet sixteen in the afternoon and Amy's parents anniversary in the evening which overlaped. We also saw Jeanne in the parking garage. We realized we only had 45 minutes to get back to Katie's party which was pushing it. First we got lost, and that made me stressed so I had even more trouble. Also part of the trip involved flying upside down. We missed the parties so I had to go where I was spending the night, Maggie's house (I don't know why!) although I didn't get there until 5AM and I was trying to sleep but Maggie and some of her Asian friends were leaving to go... uh somewhere not really sure. Some sort of protest I think but they were dressed like Mickey Mouse and friends and they told me it was a commentary on something cultural. Then Maggie's mom (who was completely unlike her real mom) comes in with a baby or more of a toddler who is really interested in my stuff but I'm still trying to sleep and the mom is all "Yeah, this is where he works." implying that I'm in the way. Then another guy named Glenn came in and he had a whole 'nother family although so I think they were polyamorous. Plus another guy who is a member at the club named Mr. Macnamara and he was just visiting his secret family and he kept saying "Aren't I cool like _____?" and naming random celebrities that really didn't pertain to the young audience although they heartily agreed. Then I moved the cot around the room, which was entirely pepto bismal pink, carpet and walls with just a cot and one pink dresser. I was tired but I also really wanted to leave. Eventually I woke up.

And here are some dreams I neglected to post for a long time but I had them at Camp Barnabas so here they are and entitled:

Campy Dreams

I dreamt that my car was stolen.

Secondly, I dreamt that I was bitten by a child and it left several concentric marks like so:

Almost sharklike. Then I saw a demon trying to kill a baby being held by a woman and I tried to grab the baby and tried to shout all the usual things that one does when they are performing an exorcism but all the adults around (this took place in an elevator) couldn't see the demon so they were trying to get the baby away from me except one little boy who could see it too and pointed and said "Look!" so the adults sort of paused and it became eerie. Needless to say, this dream totally freaked me out.

Then I had another dream that upset me so much that I tired to fall asleep in the dream in order to wake up but I couldn't remember what the dream was about.

Dancing Through Dream

I dreamt that I was at some sort of school/camp. I know I had to go to classes, but that we (this being a lot of friends from various places making cameos) were sleeping in cabins and everything was in a woodsy area. The dining hall was exasperating because a) I could never find Amy and Katie to eat with them and b) the line was really long and went out the door. You couldn't just go to the end either you had to check in at the cash register to get a stamp then go out and get at the end of the line. Then I was a volunteer in some sort of performance. We were in ballet get up, but no one was a trained dancer except for two curly guys. We danced inexpertly (as was required of us) and then all fell on the stage. Then Clinton Kelly walked on stage and sang a song. (This is legit, yo, he used to work as a singer on a cruise line. For realsies.) After the show was over, he made us all stay and went all evil ballet mistress on us.

And this one just for fun:

Broken Dreams

1. I dreamt that I was at a restaurant and ordered french toast but it came in one of those red plastic diner baskets and also in a puddle of what I believe to be butter so it was super soggy and disgusting. Later, I asked my mom to make french toast but she said she wouldn't make it because I had just had some the day before but I argued that it wasn't good, so it didn't count.

2 and 3. These dreams were actually interspersed, a la Julie and Julia except that I was in both of them. In one of them, I was at a theatre and I was looking for a bathroom but I couldn't find one that didn't have a long line. It was more exciting than it sounds because, I dunno it was a cool theatre and I was exploring weird not-totally-allowed-to-go-into areas. In the second story I was a Zooey Deschanel-type actress filming a quirky romantic comedy where my eccentric character falls in love with the loser skinny guy with messy dark hair much to the chagrin of the blond barrell chested jock. The jock in question, whose name was Ian and looked like this guy John from Camp Barnabas whom I called Jack in my head but Tyler called Eathan, had a car that was like the Indiana Jones ride vehicles: several rows and no top. Each row had a different sports logo adorning it. I or I guess my character was hanging out with him and all his beer-chugging muscle-toting buddies and they were being jackdonkeys and I went for a walk, leaving my purse (Stupid, I know. I didn't write it.) and then they drove off. I met up with them somewhere else but they didn't get my purse and they wouldn't take me back to get it and I was mad. He tried to take my arm and told me to get back in the car (as they so often do) but I refused. The last scene we filmed was the lame but sweet guy and I were frolicking in some tall "California gold" grass. And I wore a longish navy summer dress with tiny yellow and orange flowers all over it. Yeah.